Way way back. Last month, last year, last decade, all the way back on December 6th, I had an MRI. A stable MRI according to the Doctor (NO, Nuero-Oncologist). He called to let me know that things looked good before we left town that night for the weekend. If he had not called I wouldn’t get information from him until our next scheduled meeting on December 18th. While such delay would ramp up the drama it would also ramp up the anxiety. The phone call was the pin that popped the balloon so that there wouldn’t be a risk of a pressure build up over the delay.
On December 18th we saw the images. Yup. The Doctor was right. They looked pretty much the same as the previous MRI.
At the appointment, after showing us the stable images, the Doctor brought up the possibility of another type of chemo. Here’s where things stand: I’m on a pill every six weeks called CCNU. A person usually does 6-8 rounds of CCNU. Because the CCNU severely reduces my platelets, its period of administration has been repeatedly extended. I could stop where I’m at, do one more round of CCNU, or do two more rounds of CCNU. OR I could possibly do six months of an intravenous drug called carboplatin. I just realized that, while explaining, it’s very complicated. Explaining well might even require yarn and photos and a blank wall and tape. I can’t avoid dealing with the situation but I’ll save you. Basically I would either keep doing the same thing for a cycle or two more of CCNU or start six months or so of intravenous carboplatin. Either way I would continue receiving Avastin infusions every other week.
While I like the freedom in my decision, a little more guidance might be helpful. Although I’m sure I know more than most, I don’t know enough for my liking about chemo or carboplatin. It’s hard to make decisions based on what seems like incomplete information…or, I should say, it’s harder for me to make a decision when I don’t know the correct answer or have a crystal ball. I guess the best anyone can do is collect the most relevant information as a basis. Since I don’t own a crystal ball (or a future Almanac - although that still might not help in this situation) I’m in the information collecting stage. My next appointment with the Doctor should be January 8th. Although it’s already scheduled I’ve learned through experience not to count my chickens. I’m in the process of building up my armada right now. That way I’ll have adequate ammunition when that appointment happens. (However, I very much like my NO. He’s not the enemy, he’s an ally. My questions aren’t necessarily bullets. That might make this the wrong analogy. I guess cancer is the enemy. But as long as the scans continue to be stable it’s fine too.) On Wednesday, January 8, my NO will possibly provide me better ammunition. Coming soon on the heels of that appointment is another one or two appointments followed by another MRI…also not scheduled yet. Maybe what I’ve already taken is enough to again induce stability, maybe not? I don’t know.